The legacy that was BC Bob.

Welcome to the online edition of BC Bob.

Email me if you have any new content to add.

Bob doesn't have a dating motto but I think this sums up his love life.
"Most of the women I've dated are like Pringles.
They're white, slightly warped and they snap easily."

Words Bob can't pronounce

Papal visit - Popal visit
Restaurant - Restarount
Salmon - Sollmon
Oh! - Ow!
Pumpkin - Punkin
Variable - Varable
Hoboken - Habauken
Armoire - Amwire
Manila folder - Vanilla folder
Chouteau - SHOW tow (emPHAsis on the wrong sylLABle).
Tryst - Tryest
Bull - Bowl

Phrases Bob Uses All the Time

Ya know...
I can't say... You see...
Whaaaat?!?!
Do I get to make my 1 phone call now?
That's the last time I pick the soap up for you.
Are you done with that yet?
It's time for a beverage...
Exactly!
You know what I'm sayin?
Ow!...OK
I'm thirsty!
He'll get over it.
That'll work.
Gettaloadathis
That's it, I ain't sayin' no more--hey, gettaloadathis
You don't wanna know
You buy the first round and I'll get the next one
Don't ask. You don't want to know...
Good morning James.
You'll be fine!
I hate it for ya.
You need to calm down.
You need to relax.
I take thee (insert name here).
Look at that fuck'n guy.
Can you watch the phone for a minute?
I'll be out of town.
I will say one thing...
I'm taking off Friday.
Swingandamiss...
Strike two!
You're a funny guy.
Is that wrong? (added 08/06/08)

Phrases Bob Lies About all the Time

I'm staying in Columbus until...
I'm coming in early tomorrow.
I'm coming in tomorrow.
I'll be a little late. (shows up at noon).
I'm going to start working overtime.
I'm going to stop drinking.
We're just friends.
I'm bringing my lunch everyday this week.
You buy the first round and I'll get the next one.
I'll pay him back! (in a defensive tone).
Hey! I'm firm with Bobby.
Bobby does what I tell him.
I really do love Yvette.
I'm a really caring person on the inside.
I haven't looked on the internet for a date since I started seeing Yvette.
Honest officer, I haven't had a drink to thing...
I'm taking calls for Tracy.
You're hurting my feelings.
 

Things that Bob is confused about

Jack be quick, Jack be numb, Jack jump over the candle stick.

It's way out in left base.

Bob was asked to think of a word starting with O. He says "abortion".

My parents let me do what I wanted and I turned out fine.

The old man in the boat (is really 'Rime of the Ancient Mariner').

Bob says he put some code in a program to keep the user from getting stuck in an "infamous" loop.

You can have your cake and the icing, too.

'Pawn on a pulpit' (translation from Bob: you're a loser, and you're put on a pedestal).

J.R. tells Bob he is cleaning his house tonight. Bob says "you're so domesticated".

"That one really cut the straw" (Presumably meaning, "That was the straw that broke the camel's back").

"The group is going to shit in a handbag".

"That's not what I'm sayin'...know what I'm sayin'?"

"Hold your horses on".

Roman Noodles.

Bob while working on a problem, "Man this is eating my lunch".

Bob: "So you take some onions...you know, what do they call those green ones?"
J.R.:  Green onions.
Bob: "Yeah, that's it! So anyway...."

"Boy, that Edgefield Winery in Portland Oregon makes the BEST
Caberet Sauvignon...know what I'm sayin'?"

Chris: That guy that was on Match Game died.
Mike: You mean Gene Rayburn?
Bob:   Oh, the writer?
Mike, Chris and Tom: What?
Bob:   Oh, that was Gene Rodenberry.
Mike:  I think he means Ray Bradbury...
Bob:   Yeah, that's it....

Noted herpetologist Bob Phillips shared his knowledge.
of the "kimono lizard".

Bob to Tracy: "So, what did you visit while in Rome? The coliseum and stonehenge?"

Bob's standard interview question - "So, do you own a boat?"
If the answer is "No", Bob's follow-up question - "Are you going to buy one?"

Bob: That control record is going to make me rich someday...

Bob keeps calling a new AB product "Pig Nose Stout".
The new product is actually called "Bare Knuckle Stout".
The theory is, Bob heard "Stout" and thought "snout", thus the pig reference.

Bob was explaining how Bobby used to sneak out of his bedroom but that he
doesn't do that anymore because, as Bob says, "I nipped it in the butt."

Email conversation between Bob and Michael while Bob is in HTN doing an install with Brian...
Michael: How's it going down there?
Bob:      Today is a holiday, San Jacinto day, so things are quiet.
Michael: San Jacinto day? Are there going to be fireworks anywhere tonight?
Bob:      With all of the Mexican food Brian ate, I wouldn't doubt it.

Bob used this analogy when comparing two people with opposite traits - "It was like night and dark."

A customer asked Bob to help her set up a printer for one of the breweries.
When he was finished, she asked if he would set it up at the rest of the breweries.
Bob responded, "Whaddya think this is, Christmas?"

Sadly, Yvette's uncle passed away after an illness:
Bob:       Yvette had talked to her aunt about putting her uncle in a hosta.
Tracy:     Hosta?
Bob:       Yeah, ya know, because he was sick.
Michael:  Bob, a hosta is a plant.
Bob:        Isn't a hosta where they put sick people? I thought they called it a hosta.

Upon Bob's return from the funeral:
Bob: I asked the lady at the funeral home if there was a Starbucks around there.
She said she would make a pot of coffee for me. I told her no thats ok, I don't
really drink coffee, but I wanted a latte or something like that. She said there's
a Starbucks at the university. She was trying to draw me a map when the guy from the
funeral home said he'd drive me there. I told the girls, "Come on girls, we're going to ride in the hearst."
Michael:    Hearst?
Bob:         Yeah, the hearst.
Michael:    Bob, it's hearse. Hearst is a newspaper chain.
Bob:         Hearst?
Michael:    Hearse.
Bob:         Hearst?
Michael:   There's no "T" on the end. Hearse.
Bob:         Whatever. So anyhow, I was trying to make small talk with the guy so I asked him if
the funeral business is seasonal. He said it used to be before a lot of people got
air conditioning. So I asked him if they do cremations. He said they don't do that.
So I told him, "Well, you can just get a big Webber and put it out in back."
He didn't think it was funny. He didn't talk to me much after that.

Bobby wrecked his car. Bob is going to fix it himself. Bobby wants the car ready by Saturday
so he can drive to Fairview Heights to visit a girl he met. Bob said he told Bobby,
"Ya know, just hold on to your pants on fire."

Bob was heard saying "Man, when she reads that it's really gonna hit the shit fan. Know what I mean?"

Pictures of our good friend Bob.

Page Last Updated - September 26, 2011 07:28:58 PM - Version 1.2